Breaking the patterns of the family and culture is a very tricky business. When everyone claims sanity and nothing makes sense you might question yours. The truth and the lie is blended together and people are trying to be good and correct when nothing backs them up fully.
I noticed this growing up in the 1950’s. Adults spoke one thing and then the opposite. I had a truth meter and even then I began to trust it. I realized people want to believe lots of things that made no sense and ignored common sense. The logic they claimed was illogical.
LET GO OF EXPECTATIONS
We match with our parents and other authority figures to stay safe and get taken care of since childhood. Somehow we are sinners no matter what and never feel good enough. Judgment is high, acceptance is low.
It begins with babies being good if they meet the needs of the parents instead of looking to supporting the child. A good baby eats sleeps and poops on time. How is one who has different needs bad, I ask all the time?
I was such a good girl I almost died several times in my life and woke up in time to heal and move out of an unsafe home. Learning to love ourselves enough to take care of us is a revolutionary act. We are supposed to live by the rules. The ones that make no sense and hurt us and others too.
Life is not what people want it to be, life is what it is. We go crazy when we try to make things different then what they are. It’s the square peg in the round hole, it just does not fit and it hurts when we try to force it.
WAKE UP AND HEAL
In my search for physical healing I found mental and emotional and spiritual healing was not just equal it was even more important to survive and thrive. We can do the correct things, but if we keep the patterns that we followed to become unwell, the disease continues.
Loving us and believing in our goodness when we are breaking out of sick patterns of society and family and self is important. Life is not about believing the company line. As we have found companies are focused on supporting the illusion and health of the company, not people. This goes for religion, country and family too.
SUZY SUNSHINE IN THE RAIN
Although I knew all of the ugly fearful controlling things that were going on around me as a child I held the light even then. I did not have to believe in a certain way or religion, I just knew love and wanted to share it.
I saw the best and knew the rest. I remember saying, “If only everyone would be responsible for themselves, the world would work.” I fought for my life and health which required waking up more each day and breaking the patterns and beliefs of the family and the culture.
I trusted myself and my inner knowing. If it did not feel good to me I questioned it to find truth. I continued to look for health, happiness, truth, beauty and light while the world, myself and my family were falling apart.
I kept looking for solutions. My methods and journey worked for me and I found ways to help others along the way too. I learned that other people did not have to approve or agree and that if they were the ones holding the problem they would fight me and say I was wrong. Everyone has their own journey of awakening and healing, I was on survival and wanted to thrive.
When we do things against us and truth we get sick and our body and mind breaks down. When people go into denial or blame they become insane. For us to try to match people who are acting and speaking against truth hurts us, even if they are our parents and partners.
We want things to be easy, for the most part they are not. People who are not healthy are not going to be looking out for you in a way that helps. We each are to pay attention and to look out for us. Codependence teaches us to manipulate others to get what we want, when we just can be authentic and real and have our needs met.
Even when we think we are correct, it is not for us to fix others and get them to match what we think they should be. Honoring each person’s experience and perspective allows us to find our own.
BE THE SOLUTION
To be sane in an insane world we have to stay out of saving the world first, we must get on firm ground of sanity and save us. Only when we know the highest truth can we help others too. When we are trying to help other people, we better be on solid ground.
It is very easy to be the problem and lose our way when we play savior or controller. Each person has their own reality. No one has to match us or understand us, we do. We all have our challenges; no one is a better or worse person for being who we are.
To have compassion requires a firm grip on your strengths and vulnerability without judgment, and know we are all equal in this world. Ultimately we are all light and love, peace and joy and perfect health. We just have to remember and be it.
Some may call this insane and keep chewing on the problem. To be sane is to keep focused on the solution and love all of us through. If you are not happy, healthy and peaceful, keep focused on solutions and act on them. This is how we find truth and sanity. You will be glad you did and so will many others.
Enjoy the Journey,
Be The Medicine, Live the Power of You!
Janet is available for coaching and healing on Skype, phone or in person. She cuts to the core of things and saves us time and helps us help ourselves. Call today for an interview to see how you might be the solution easily.